"I don’t think people realize, when they’re just getting started on an eating disorder or even when they’re in the grip of one, that it is not something that you just “get over.” For the vast majority of eating-disordered people, it is something that will haunt you for the rest of your life. You may change your behavior, change your beliefs about yourself and your body, give up that particular way of coping in the world. You may learn, as I have, that you would rather be a human than a human’s thin shell. You may get well. But you never forget."
It’s like drowning but you just won’t fucking die."